Baking Flour of a Delectable Dessert Called Love

I just have to write it down.

I have a good mate for years. A guy who is afraid to commit and all he wanted is hot sizzling monkey love with hot chicks that come along. Beyond that, nothing. We had been talking rarely lately but each time we get a chance to talk, same topic. I have moved on from one love story to the other stumbling and winning pinnacles of my life, it is still the same story with him.

I never get bored to listen and converse with him though, because I know that deep inside this guy, is someone who is thinking about something more he wanted and keep on denying that he also needed: someone to love and will love him back. Don't tell me that I am romanticising or over reacting but as a friend, I know better. Not just women think the same. We all are afraid of growing old alone.

He told me one time: "Maybe at some point, I'll find someone who will make me commit." And then the other: "I will never be ready to commit." And then the other: "It's going nowhere but sex is good."

All I hope for is that at some point, he will care enough to admit to himself that this lifestyle is getting tiring. That he won't date for ulterior reasons alone.

So maybe he did.

I saw his Facebook page albeit his status still says "single," I keep on seeing a lot of pictures of him with this woman. I've checked them out and told myself that what I'm thinking "can't be true." But seems like it. Only one way to find out. I sent him a message to ask if that woman in his photos are his "hmmm." He just replied and said "Yup, she's my girlfriend."

I was overwhelmed! The long time I have been hoping for! For 7 years I have known this guy, that G word never ever occurred. I can never be happier!

But I just realised something. Let's measure the flour into two parts:

Sifted

Truth be told, men (or perhaps women) who are commitment-phobic will bend their own rule when that someone comes along. No scientific explanation here but there will always be someone that will knock us off our feet and realise that we have to take this love route and never care about anything else but happiness. That it is worth the risk from leaving your old lifestyle and logic. It is just the way it is. Amazing.

Getting deeper beyond BF-GF stage, some men have their "va-va-voom" moment when they know that this is the woman that they will marry even if they never plan nor think about it ever before. That moment of thunder just comes and captures them. Unfortunately, this never happens all the time. When you know, you know (well, most of the time).

Unsifted

Did my friend really found something special with this woman to finally commit or he lowered his standards and expectations because he realises that his clock is ticking and he's getting old and alone?

Some people resort to "Whatever. I'll just take it even though it doesn't fit well." Because the sale will close tonight. Because the purse is so pretty and it is the wrong colour but you buy it anyway because it is the "in" thing. Because you think that everybody in your group of friends are married but you. Because society said that a small dog in a Louis Vuitton bag are cool though it'll break your bank. Because a sex scandal tape will make you more popular.

Shortchanging won't solve anything. It will make things worse. You don't want to regret anything in your life when you look back.
_________________

I am not saying that you look for perfection anally. All I am saying that you know what fits you. No organised or fucked up society will tell you what to do but you. Besides, the cliche "nobody's perfect" is something to celebrate about. We are all beautifully imperfect and we have a choice. Our own time. Our own real moment.

It's just a little thought to provoke since this is a very interesting topic. I may probably never know what my friend really feels but I hope for the best for him-- that he finally found love and how superfragicalistic it feels.

After all, I care about my friends' happiness. I will always hope for their success, peace, ardor and everything great.

Positively Cynical: Yours Truly

I am considered a positive, go-getter person but it seems that a cog of my mind is still my old cynical self.

It’s all about puppy love and high school.

I have to confess that I’ve watched High School Musical 1, 2 and last night, 3. I am guilty of patrolling on something cheesy and no-brainer like this!!! Please do not castrate me (oh yeah I can remember I don’t have testicles, but you know what I mean). There are some days where the Disney Empire still runs through my veins and I get curious thus the movie played in my telly tube. Did I enjoy it? Not really.

I rolled my eyes for that “puppy-love-scene-development“ with Gabrielle and Zac’s character… I forgot what the name was. Those seriousness and “forever” theme makes me want to puke at this Generation Juvy (aside from not looking at Vanessa Hudgens the same way again after her sexual undie pics over the ‘net – not judging her but I cannot see a virginal character out of her anymore, to my amusement).

I invited a girl friend over dinner last weekend and we were talking about teenagers (when we were once before as well) thinking that they know everything. As we look back, yes we thought so and we learned everything the hard way. Nothing and no force can control this phenomenon but mistakes that make teenagers fall flat on their faces with lessons of reality, little by little, until they become mature adults (realistically, not everybody grows up though!).

What makes me feel sick about this High School love is that they delude kids that when you love at that age, it is yours forever-- that you won’t live nor survive without that person ever. That you have to beat all odds and be together even you’re miles apart when you go separate ways in college. That you rush things and think of marrying each other, or even falling to sex as early as 13 years of age!

My rant will be endless if I do not stop here. I’m sure you already catch my drift amongst the silver lining that they teach kids that love is powerful blah blah blah. You are still motivating them to be curious about kissing at that tender age and get pregnant in the process!

So, during the HS Musical 3 sequence, I kept on sighing and rolling my eyes on some scenes that involved these 2 movie/reality lovebirds. It comes to show that fantasy of many teenagers that this is the meaning of destiny, clinging on romance and dreams. After all, nobody knew better at that age.

The balloon can be popped once a teenager gets the taste of reality. You become older and hopefully wiser and life goes on. “It takes a lot of frogs to kiss before you will find your Prince Charming.” It’s just not about dating but individual life experiences. You leave the foolish high school-ness and carry on to realise that life is beyond what we knew it was before. That taking steps to the future is always a surprise, but can be strategically organised in a way. Unfortunately, not everybody has this perception. Especially the new generation teens. That media is to be blamed. And yet so maybe movies like this can be blamed partially.

I am afraid to be a parent in the future because of this. I don’t have any idea how my kids will turn out no matter how much I balance parenting and all that. But if I don’t try at some point, I wouldn’t know and I should be taking my own dose of truth: that I will know what to do when I get there; That my present will teach me the way for the future if I am open to life experience. And I always am.

Thus saying that, I will still keep rolling my eyes to juvenile love and deluded teenagers.

I'm trying to get a video parody but nothing seems that appropriate to my taste at the moment.

A Year of New 'Dos and Haphazarding Observations

I.

It has been a year and 2 days since I came around and got over my painful past and started living life surrounded by good things. I got over so much of the bitterness and anger and gave myself a chance to live peacefully with myself and others. It was a heck of a great journey. Something where I will always look back and feel humbled and blessed.

The biggest wisdom earned: I am not that stupid. Because I know what I want in life and there is no compromise, I made great decisions that ended up so well, I cannot thank this gift of wisdom enough.

II.

Another subject to tackle is that I just observed that in this superficial world, agents and spotters mostly think that only tall people has the X-factor. They settle with so-so looking peeps rather than having pretty shorties. I guess that's why it is superficial. It serves its part of the balance. Like money will make you look good... NOT. If you are fugly, you are fugly as trash with cash goes. (Oi, suck it, Wish.)

Okay, I am having some brain juice draught here but I need to put up some of my little thoughts over the last weekend. I'm out of here.

Life is beautiful. Keep that in mind.

Clicker and the Colourful Life it Ticks

This is a very late blog from when I had this experience. I went to Manila for a few days so I only had the time to post this here just now.

Last week, June 23rd, I attended Steve Mc Curry's talk sponsored by my company. I just wanted to meet another National Geographic photographer and hear what he says.

I believe that photographers will be at their heights of success, published or unpublished, because they have the "eye". Yes, in this digital age, people have more advantage to click away and get enough good photos because they can review it right away. But coming from traditional film to digital, pro photographers just get better and better with this advantage.

As Steve answered one of my colleague's question, he said that there is no difference between film and digital for him. Digital can just do more than what a film can do but regardless, he said that, "it's not the camera but the photographer." I couldn't agree more.

I saw more of his works while he talked and clicked away slide after slide in his presentation on the projector. I was in awe. I was not surprised though but his style of using colours gives more soul to the picture. A true NatGeo blood. A true gatekeeper of eye capture in a frame.

So I got a quick chance to speak with him, showing me his baby on his mobile phone. It was a lovely cat. Don't we just love mobile phone cameras too... easy to carry a photo album with you!

It was a great experience. It's always great to hear great successful people talk. They earned it because they are talented and is still working hard for it. Quentin Tarantino did it for me too!

Steve Mc Curry is kind enough to bow to my height a little bit

Check out his website at http://www.stevemccurry.com/

Top photo credit: Magnum Photos for Steve Mc Curry's Tailor in Monsoon taken in India, 1983. (Steve said that this guy was being tracked down by the sewing machine company and gave him a new one :) )